


scars

by heonied



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternative Universe - Kingdom, Angst, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Prince Hyunwoo, Servant Hyungwon, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 12:00:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18010541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heonied/pseuds/heonied
Summary: he knew all eyes were on him, he heard the angry growls of the king before him, felt him spit in his face as hiscrimewas presented to everyone.but it was the most innocent crime he could imagine, the most beautiful one he could commit and not a single ounce of regret graced his mind. his heart was telling him it was worth it. that his love was worth dying for.





	scars

**Author's Note:**

> this is a work from last year that i'm reposting. up to this day it's one of my favourite things i've written.

not a touch and not a glance.

not any sign of contact as hyunwoo made his way through the room, not sparing a single glance towards the small crowd of guards and servants gathered on its sides.

head titled down but posture grand as always, as he walked down the hall, steps echoing in hyungwon's head like drums during a funeral march. 

or maybe it was his heart, beating out of control, mobilised by fear and violently making his head spin. it felt like a dream but it wasn't, it was cruel reality.

no eye contact. 

he stood in front of the throne next to his father, looking down at hyungwon as if he were nothing. and in a sense he was, absolutely meaningless compared to the royal lives hovering above him. 

he did not listen to what was being said, his mind fishing out for just one sentence, a signal and the clink of men in armor walking towards him. 

his knees were starting to hurt, so brittle against the cold hard surface he was kneeling on, his legs so weak he was scared they wouldn't be able to support him much longer.

he should be begging for forgiveness, he knew, but he had pride and his heart was set out, he would not lie to them nor to himself.

he wondered if hyunwoo was ready to do the same. if he meant all his hushed promises, all the words that left his mouth when it was just the two of them.

he wondered how strong the prince's love was.

if it was a fragile blooming flower that was about to be stepped on never to get up and grow again. or if it was like the trees in the forests surrounding the castle. majestic and strong, standing in place when everything else fell down on them, trying to knock them down. 

he wondered if the roots of hyunwoo's love were set in strong enough. he wondered if the prince was insane enough to take his side in this, if he was foolish enough to speak up.

he knew all eyes were on him, he heard the angry growls of the king before him, felt him spit in his face as his _crime_ was presented to everyone.

but it was the most innocent crime he could imagine, the most beautiful one he could commit and not a single ounce of regret graced his mind. his heart was telling him it was worth it. that his love was worth dying for.

hyunwoo looked painfully wrecked. it was perhaps the only thing hyungwon regretted, that things came to this and hyunwoo had to suffer too. he wished he wasn't there but the king was merciless, even when it came to his own son.

his son, that hyungwon knew to be a gentle man. beautiful and quiet, so well-mannered, kind and loved by the people. the complete opposite of his tyrant parent. hyunwoo was anything but cruel. he had always cared for hyungwon. from the moment they were young up until they were adults, more aware of their feelings, of their reality and their needs. their needs were what doomed them, in the end. the need to be with each other, the need for each other's touch, the private moments hyunwoo always tried to steal out of his day, the moments of thrill that were the only thing hyungwon ever waited for.

hyunwoo was a gentle man but hyungwon slowly built around that, appealing to his submissive side to get what he wanted. it wasn't with bad intentions, never, he cared for hyunwoo and it was never about using the prince. sometimes it was just him begging to have hyunwoo thrust in harder, sometimes he'd get him to try new things, new positions, test new feelings and indulge in them. hyunwoo was careful but he liked it, hyungwon knew. it worked. they worked.

up until they got caught.

it was a terrifying thought, to have to live without ever feeling hyunwoo's mouth on him again. 

hyungwon's brain did not have enough time to process what he was about to lose.

the king spoke his words after a long silence, a dreadful silence where not one soul dared to breathe too loudly, not one of the usually gossiping servants dared to whisper a word, they just watched in fear. not for hyungwon, but for themselves. for the possibility of ever being in the boy's situation. 

'don't. father, don't.'

his voice was broken and hyungwon cursed under his breath, tears aggresively forming in his eyes when he heard it.

he spoke up. that damn fool couldn't keep quiet through this.

he begged the king to listen to him but hyungwon could feel it was to no avail.

'if you punish him you will have to punish me as well. in front of this whole court, by all the gods, if you are a just ruler you will punish me the same way.' 

hyungwon risked looking up, only to see hyunwoo was now kneeling in front of his father as well, hand on his chest as he played a dangerous game of challenging the king and his rule in front of his own people.

it was silent again and hyungwon was scared to lift his eyes, scared he'll trigger something, scared he'll see his lover get what he was so foolishly asking for.

he would speak up if he could, beg for death if only to stop hyunwoo from speaking further but he was too much of a coward.

'whip him.' 

he heard the command and his eyes shot up to look at hyunwoo, terrified until he understood the king was pointing at him, not the prince.

hyunwoo got up to protest but hyungwon could not see the end result of that, as one of the guards kicked his back to make him bend over and lifted his linen shirt off his head to reveal a skinny pale surface. 

he tried hard not to make noises. gods knew he had practise in that, from all the times hyunwoo had met him in the middle of the night, and they made love in barely secluded places in the castle, without a care in the world but still knowing he had to keep quiet. 

the stings were scrutinizing, each whip digging harder at his skin and cutting deeper and his arms and legs were shaking violently as he tried to keep himself up, knowing falling on the ground would result in a worse pain and a harsher beating. 

fifty, he counted, it took fifty until the king had commanded them to stop. that's what hyungwon thought happened, as the pain had made him deaf at the time, his mind too hazy to call him awake or even alive. it was a miracle he had not passed out. 

he thought he felt something drip down his sides but he was not sure whether it was blood or sweat or a figment of his imagination. it didn't hurt, it _burned_. as if his whole back was on fire, his skin being fried by the flames and there was nothing that could put them out. nothing that could ease the pain.

someone yanked his shoulders back, forcing him to straighten his posture and his hands could no longer support him. he didn't manage to hold back the cry that escaped his mouth when he was put back into his previous position. he wanted to fall down so he didn't have to move a muscle again. it took everything he had inside him to keep his body up, his pride being the only one strong enough to help.

he thought he could see tears in hyunwoo's eyes but he wasn't sure. he doubted it, doubted the prince would cry in this situation, expose his weaknesses like this. two of the guards were holding him down and his eyes were set on hyungwon, filled with pain as if he truly was the one getting the punishment. it just made the boy's heart sink more.

it was quiet in the throne room, but hyungwon's head was buzzing and he could not tell the source of the noise. he was grateful for the cold air slightly soothing his wounds, as he tried to regain a conscious mind.

hyunwoo dropped to his knees again, and hyungwon whined slightly, begging the gods to let it all end.

the prince instead begged the king to punish him too and hyungwon was furious, unable to believe how stupid he was acting. he wished he could tell him to stop, to behave the way he was supposed to. it was pathetic to see him like this, in front of the castle's residents, and he knew it was unfitting of a man in his position. he blamed himself for hyunwoo's behaviour. he had broken the prince, he thought.

the king spat again, his eyes ignoring hyungwon and focusing on his son. he was enranged, hyungwon could tell, completely losing it in front of everyone to see. 

'you are a fool. this is not how i raised you.' the words echoed through the wide room, bouncing in hyungwon's head. 

'you are not my son.' was the last thing hyungwon heard the king say before he turned back to look at the servant boy, his heart freezing. 

'take this thing to the dungeons. the prince will be the one to oversee its execution, once he regains his mind.'

 

hyungwon hated dirt. and now it was everywhere, underneeth his feet, in between his fingers, in his mouth and hair and in his wounds. it was where he belonged, and where he'll soon lay lifeless but it still made him want to cry.

it was the worst possible end. he wished they whipped him harder, he wished he would have bled out there, in the throne room. he wished the king drove his sword through his heart, but no. his cruelty knew no limits.

he tried not to think about hyunwoo but his mind was a treacherous thing and every time he did, he broke down in tears. it was an exhausting procedure, that only drove him further into despair.

he knew he could not keep the prince out of his head completely, him being the only thing he held dear in this world, so he decided to take control of his thoughts.

instead he went back to when they were younger, when the prince was still a child and they were allowed to play in the gardens with the other boys. the queen believed it was good for hyunwoo to have company of his own age. 

they would play pretend at fighting amongst the tall willows surrounding a secluded glade beyond the castle walls. it was their favourite place, despite it not being very rich in anything other than grass, but the far stretching plains gave enough freedom for kids their age to feel at home there. 

hyungwon was never trained to fight. he was an orphan boy, lucky enough to have been taken into the kitchens by one of the elderly cooks, who for no reason at all decided to take care of him. she did not have to, but she did, she provided him with food and a place to sleep and that was a debt hyungwon was never able to pay back. he had never held a real sword in his hands, nor shot a bow or knew anything about the means of survival. young hyunwoo laughed at him for that, celebrated his victories when he managed to easily throw the younger boy to the ground and punch the wooden makeshift sword out of his hands. hyungwon wanted to be mad at him for it, but he was taught never to go against the prince or hurt him in any way. so he stayed silent and let the kid beat him at various games, applauding him for his victories and admiring his strength, just to please the prince. thinking about it later, hyungwon saw how much more mature than hyunwoo he used to be, despite being the younger one. he just hoped it helped the boy have a happy childhood.

when they grew a bit older hyunwoo got tired of playing with fake swords. he had started his proper swordsplay training and his various lessons at court kept him inside the castle, with less time to play outside. hyungwon had started becoming more useful around the kitchens, running errands for the servants working there and scurrying his way through the halls. 

when they wandered outside it was not to run aimlessly around the forest anymore. sometimes they would take walks and hyungwon would listen to the prince tell him about what he had learned or how things were going in the kingdom. in return hyungwon shared all gossip he had heard among the servants. most did not notice him or pay him any mind, too irrelevant to be looked upon even by them. 

they had built a small fort of sorts in the forest. it was just a place where they could hide away, covered by the trees and nature surrounding them, a perfect escape from both of their duties.

they'd spend all their free time there, with not much to do other than chat, eat and play games. hyunwoo had brought a board of chess to the fort once, encouraging hyungwon to play against him but it soon turned out the younger had never laid his eyes on the game before. hyunwoo would spend weeks teaching him how to play until finally he was confident enough to one day win against the prince.

despite everything he was told, the royal child did not get mad. he looked at him with a smile and admitted his loss, not seeming at all bothered by it. more like he was proud of hyungwon.

hyunwoo was always a handsome young man, adored by all the maidens in the kingdom. he had a line of suitresses from various royal families, even outside the kingdom, waiting to be wed to him when he came of age. hyungwon didn't understand why he got so angry inside every time hyunwoo mentioned that one of the girls are to be their guests at the castle. he did not understand why he was so upset when the prince discussed how pretty one of them was, when he talked about his suitress's family and how beneficient the marriage would be for their kingdom. how he seemed so engaged in his own matchmaking business. hyungwon did not want the prince to get married. but he didn't understand why.

it was only when he kissed hyunwoo for the first time that things started making sense in his head. it was hestitant, born in the heat of the moment, when something in his head told him he wants answers to his questions. answers like how hyunwoo's mouth would feel against his, if it's warm and soft like the boy's hands, what it would be like to be the one to get so close to the prince before all others, kiss him before his future wife ever did. 

hyunwoo was not surprised, like hyungwon expected him to be. he did not push him away, did not command anyone to lock him away, did not have him thrown out. something along the lines of curiousity mixed with lust burned in his eyes instead and he brought his hand up to pet hyungwon's cheek. and that's when hyungwon felt his entire world crumble, expose himself to his very bones and he wondered, he regretted, and he wanted more.

the queen died when hyunwoo was seventeen years of age, soon after him and hyungwon started indulging in feelings unfit of two men in their positions. everything changed then.

hyungwon never knew the king well. he only saw him a few times, from far away at festivities or when he occasionally served him in the royal court. he only knew the man from hyunwoo's stories, but it was clear the young prince was much closer to his mother, her being the deciding and guiding factor in his life. 

he figured it was her death that turned hyunwoo's father into a cold, strict tyrant. hyunwoo was not allowed to leave the castle for his own entertainment anymore. his lessons became more frequent, often leaving him exhausted at the end of the day. hyungwon knew, because with age he managed to get out of the kitchens and become one of the proper royal servants. he made hyunwoo's bed in the mornings, cleaned his room, sometimes prepared his baths or brought him food and was at the prince's every behest. hyunwoo was smart, he treated him like a normal servant when others were around. he knew gossip spreads like fire. but when it was just the two of them, all alone, he let himself go. stood closer to hyungwon as the boy was tying the ribbons on his silken formal clothes, brought his hand up to drag it through the servant's messy hair, held the boy's hand whenever it wasn't carrying his stuff around. It was all the comfort they could get, so much more rare ever since hyunwoo got locked up in his own home, by his own father. 

hyunwoo kissed him properly for the second time two years later. hyungwon could no longer call the prince a boy. he was tall and broad and strong. well mannered, kind, the pride of the kingdom. he was a grown man while hyungwon, despite being tall himself, was slim and fragile, still treated as a child by the older servants at the castle. 

the place had been in a hustle for the previous days, another royal visit, this time from some king across the seas. it seemed so unimportant to hyungwon at the time and he waited for it to be over and the life in the kingdom to be back to normal. 

hyunwoo came back from the dinner late at night, looking beautiful but somehow angry. hyungwon had hurried to prepare a bath when he heard the festivities come to an end but hyunwoo did not care for it much. 

he didn't say anything, just walked up to the boy and angled his head up so that their mouths could meet again and hyungwon was reminded what a magical feeling it was, how it made his insides melt completely. 

hyunwoo touched him in different ways than usual that night and hyungwon never thought they would cross that line. it was wrong of them, both being men, it was frowned upon, it could get them in so much trouble but that wasn't important for the time being. he was getting to know the prince in a whole new way, he was the one hyunwoo chose, he was the one being close to him like no one has before.

hyungwon found out the next day that the king had promised to wed Hyunwoo to the princess visiting their castle that night. 

 

hyungwon had tried sleeping on the hard dirty ground of his cell, his mind too exhausted from all the thoughts and memories passing through it, his eyes too heavy from all the tears he had spared. the pain in his back was unbearable and he decided to take off the blood soaked shirt that started sticking to his skin uncomfortably. 

he dreamt of the prince, as he always did.

in his dream the king was gone, and hyunwoo was the rightful ruler. hyungwon was there, always by his side. he slept in hyunwoo's bed, all throughout each night and woke up to others serving him. they made love in that bed, he held his prince close to him in that bed, he loved and laughed in that bed and his back did not hurt at all. it was untouched, perfectly even and without any scars and hyunwoo placed gentle kisses down his spine that felt like heaven.

hyungwon decided that when the time comes, that dream will be the last thing he thinks about, so that he can stay in it forever.

**Author's Note:**

> please leave any thoughts in the comments x


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